Oy Vey! The Lion of Zion Beef Patty Mina, Mon.

I have repeat offended on these.

I like fusion. Not like DHS Fusion centers or the kind of Fusion you get from overpriced, vaguely racist, New American cuisine type scam restaurants that were all the rage when I moved to NYC a decade and a half ago. No, I mean the kind of stuff that you find anywhere that multiple newly transplanted ethnic groups find themselves sharing the same area. Indian Chinese is a favorite fusion of mine. You can find Indian Chinese food anywhere in the world where there are both Indians and Chinese people and, from the 8 or 9 places I've eaten at over the years, it is exquisitely strange and delicious.

A more mixed bag is the whole oeuvre of Asian-Hot Dog-Taco-Kim Chi type stuff that you'll find in all the hipster cities. Sometimes it works well as exemplified by the East Side Kings food carts in the back yards of Austin's East Side bars. Sometimes it's just a cluster fuck of flavors being mindlessly devoured by idiots, as exemplified by the whole Asia Dog thing in Brooklyn from 7-8 years ago. So it goes.

Anyway, I had been revisiting the 1992 classic The New York Cookbook while I was also infatuated with the Zahav "Israeli" cookbook. The result was a Beef Patty Mina.

A beef patty, if you aren't familiar, is a Jamaican street food that is one part English hand pie and one part Indian samosa, sort of. Basically, you get a filling of curry and Scotch Bonnet flavored beef filling inside a yellow pocket of savory pie crust. And they're weirdly addictive. And kind of gross.

Satmars near my old loft on Flushing ave. VERY good Babkas are one block back, on the left

A Mina is a meat and veggie pie filling inside a crust made from soggy stale Matzo crackers that is layered inside a pie tin or cast iron skillet, egg washed and baked. Yep, Jewish trash food. The problem is that I liked the idea of the Mina but, frankly, hated the bland spicing of the Mina filling in the Zahav recipe. Why would you put cinnamon in a fucking ground beef filling? Right. Also, I wasn't about to make beef patty pastry dough for multiple reasons that involve laziness and my Godzilla toddler. The clear solution was to marry the Beef Patty filling with the Mina crust and call it good. This is how fusion should work, btw.

Yes, Mina is a TRASH FOOD.

 Quite proud of my elegant solution to my twin cravings, I set about making the filling. My recipe seemed odd, but legit since it came from the above mentioned NY Cookbook and from a Jamaican "Jerk King" guy. It involved beef, lots of onions, habanero chiles, curry powder and... bread crumbs. I knew the bread crumbs were wrong. Wrong texture. Very un-beef patty like, at least NY beef patties, yet I made it anyway.

One the other end I was also soaking Matzoh to line my greased cast iron pan where I promptly entered FAIL mode once again by using multiple layers of Matzoh to make the crust instead of one. The result of both fails was a dinner that was "fine." By that I mean, it was edible and even kind of good but not at all what I was shooting for in my mind. But, hey, my loss is your gain as below I give you the corrected "with all my powers" Beef Patty Mina recipe for your perusal and contemplation.

Ingredients

Beef Patty Filling

1 lb ground beef on the leaner side
1 onion, finely minced
3 tablespoons vegetable oil
3 tablespoons AP flour
1 clove garlic, minced
1 tablespoon mild curry powder
1 teaspoon ground cumin
1 teaspoon dried thyme
1/2 teaspoon ground allspice
1/2 teaspoon white pepper
1 1/2 teaspoons kosher salt
1/2 cup beef broth
1 tablespoon scotch bonnet hot sauce or to taste

Mina Crust

1 package Matzoh crackers
1 egg, whisked with 1 tablespoon cold water

Begin

Heat up a large skillet on high heat and add the oil. Once the oil is hot but not smoking, add the beef. Chop up with your grandma spoon and cook until it's brown then add onion and cook 3-4 minutes until soft and a little brown. Add the garlic and cook 1 minute. Add all spices/salt and cook 1-2 minutes then add the flour and reduce heat to medium and cook for 1-2 minutes until it starts to stick then SLOWLY stir in the beef stock until a very thick gravy consistancy is reached. Add hot sauce and mix. Turn off heat and let sit for 30-40 minutes.

Meanwhile, preheat oven to 425'. Grease up your cast iron (12" or so) with butter and dip 4-5 matzoh crackers in water and let them sit for 3-4 minutes until soft. Cover the bottom and sides with ONE layer of cracker. Yes, they will break. Do your best to use larger pieces but make sure, no matter what, to cover the whole interior of the cast iron with crackers then add the filling and top with one layer of crackers and then brush with the egg wash. Toss in the oven and cook until the top is golden and glossy. Remove from the oven and let it rest for 5 minutes then CAREFULLY flip the Mina onto a plate like a Spanish Tortilla. Serve!!!

Addendums

You can add a 1/2 cup of leftover KFC mashed potatoes to the beef patty filling to get a slightly more Shepard's Pie type thing going on.

Also, you can add a knob of ginger, minced up, with the onions at the beginning to make it more zesty.

To get FUSION on FUSION you can add a layer of mozzarella on the top of the filling of the Mina before adding the top layer of Matzoh to yield a NYC pizza slice place classic cheesy beef patty. Gross.

P.P.S.

No, I am not sure whether I am using all of the internet meme images that appear in my blog posts Ironically, post-Ironically or if I actually think they're funny on their face. These are strange and confusing times we live in.